5 Year Ordination Anniversary

5 Years Ago Part II: It’s my 5 year ordination anniversary! Pentecost Sunday, June 8th, 2014, a few days after graduation (which was part I of my 5 Year Anniversary Thread of 2019), I was approved for ordination by the ABCUSA, and was ordained at and with the community of Calvary Baptist Church of Denver. As I reflect back, I ponder and share below two things along with some photographs: The Call to Worship, read by my Little (not so little anymore) Theologians, and how it continues to convey such desperation in today’s realities and injustices. (Give me/us strength…) And one of the two poems read by someone dear to me, Rita Berglund, which came from Jan Richardson’s book, In Wisdom’s Path (juxtaposed with the image I used on my bulletin). It sings words reflective of the paradoxical truths of life in ministry, and life in general. (May Wisdom continue to permeate Her Power.)

Five full, and fleeting years of ministry. At times, my pastoral authority has come into question by the ongoing problem of sexism and misogyny. At times, I have been heartbroken and broken open in sacred encounters, in the presence of suffering and death, in reflection upon our nation’s and our world’s flaws and failings. I have processed so much through journaling, and running. Snapshots of tender junctures in this ministry of presence have become part of my bones and dreams. At times I have been exhausted. At times I have been inspired, surprised, affirmed, and delighted. I continue to work on being a better ally, a better practitioner of forgiveness, and I am grateful for my mentors, colleagues, experiences, challenges, support systems, spaces of darkness and flickers of light, and all of my learning opportunities. I smile about how the one thing that might have kept me from being ordained (I used a theological “a” word in my ordination paper- a bit of a source of deliberation on the ordination board…) is still what keeps me drawn to this work and study. (I suppose the board made the appropriate decision…) That a-word “thing”, a theological frame of reference, that concept, is a part of me, and it’s one piece that makes me a good chaplain and deep thinker.

It is important to reflect back on one’s ordination anniversary, and I feel grateful to have Pentecost, the Feminine Fire and Windy Wisdom of this day, set forth and incessantly whirling, to be a part of that remembrance. It is a day of renewal, breath of Spirit, restoration, to form and reform, and receive again. I’m not sure the authenticity of ministry can thrive without these moments of fresh possibility and reconnection especially in times of hopelessness, woundedness, exhaustion, each witnessed and personally experienced. And so, I remember those ancient voices in the Book of Acts, the fresh voices of my children five years ago reading a call to reflect the justice, compassion, peace, and life-giving Essence of the One we are Inspired to reflect. Those ideals were woven into the call I reluctantly acquiesced to, but knew I could not ignore. And I recollect the poetic words of a poem and blessing which affirms Sacred Paradox even in the spectrum of emotions it contains. This ordination anniversary is to me an opportunity to be reminded of the connections, community, questions, and passions which brought me to that day five years ago, and continue the appeal: “Hold me fast, and set me free…”

Benediction

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Call to worship from Sacraments and Seasons: Peacemaking Through Worship:

“In the midst of a world where people hunger and thirst…Come worship a God who feeds the hungry and calls upon us to do the same.

“In the midst of a world where people hunger and thirst…Come worship a God who feeds the hungry and calls upon us to do the same.”

“In the midst of a world where people are abused and oppressed…Come worship a God who calls for compassion and justice.”

“In the midst of a world filled with wars and rumor of war…Come worship a God who desires nothing less than peace for the world and calls us to be peacemakers.”

“In the midst of a world of spiritual emptiness… Come worship a God who gives life meaning, and calls us to walk with each other in community.”

“Come worship a God whose grace and love know no end.”

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In my turning
and returning,
take me in
and let me go.

At the center
of the spinning,
root me deep
and set me loose.

At the still point
of the spiral,
draw me close
and set me forth.

In the passage
of the seasons,
hold me fast
and set me free.
~Jan Richardson